I Lie in Wake of Dreams Forgotten
by i.anachronism
Summary: AngelFaith shipping. Angel told Faith that he can't protect her, and that she needs to protect herself. See where that led. R


**Disclaimer:**I do not own the song or the characters. I only own the plot bunny.**  
**

**  
Who am I to save you,  
To try and tame you,  
And now that you are free of me,**

You. Your dark hair, your warm chocolate eyes now intensified with a dark red fire. The fire that I watched consume your soul. Is this really what you want? A life of solitude, never knowing what it's like without the fight? You don't even look at me as you take down yet another vampire. Faith, what has this life made you become?

You look up at me, and smile, your dark eyes softening slightly at seeing me.

"Angel, what're you doing up there?" You ask laughingly.

I jump down and give you a hug. You hug back and then put your arms around my neck, staring deeply into my eyes. I stare into yours, slowly wrapping my arms around your waist.

"I missed you Angel," You whisper into my ear. I breathe deeply. Your normal musky scent is covered by more of a fruity one, and also a spicy one. I smell tangy fear, bitter betrayal, and a sort of wet depression. This was not you, the Faith I know would never let these emotions take control of her. You had one scent, and it was your scent alone, and you defiantly didn't smell like it now.

"Faith, what's wrong?" I asked pulling away. You smiled sadly, "Nothing," You stuttered.

"Faith…..please?" I asked, pulling you gently back into my arms. You stiffened for a second, and then relaxed. "Sorry Angel, I can't," You pulled away, tears streaming down your face.

Your words still echoed in my ear as I watched you walk away. _Sorry Angel, I can't._

**But next time when you break down,  
Is it me you'll take down,  
With you on your knees?**

The knock came softly and unhurriedly, but I was expecting it. I answered slowly, just liked you knocked. Both of us pretending that nothing was wrong, but we both knew, oh we knew.

You fell on my floor in a curled up heap. I could hear your sobs, and I felt you shake beneath my touch. This reminded me of that day……

* * *

_  
I slowly walked through the door; Faith dropped the can and the lighter that she was using to burn Wesley, and instead held a knife to his throat. _

"_About time, soul-boy, ready to play now?" She asked smirking  
"I'm ready."_

_Faith taunted me and fought me, and eventually I tackled her out the window. We fell into a trash can. _

"_You're gonna die!" She yelled, hitting me, "You hear me? You don't know what evil is, I'm bad. Fight back."_

_I grabbed her. "Nice try, Faith."_

_I tossed her away from me, and then walked over to her and whispered, "I know what you want. "_

_She hit me, and I hit her back. She stood up, hitting me and screaming at me, but doing no damage, she was just hysterical by that point._

"_I'm not going to make this easy for you," I said. She threw herself against me screaming, "I'm evil, I'm bad, I'm evil, you hear me? I'm bad Angel, I'm bad," She began to sob, taking hold of my shirt and shaking me, "I'm bad, do you hear me? I'm bad, I'm bad, I'm bad. Please. Angel, please, just do it." _

_Faith started sobbing, "Angel please. Just do it. Just do it. Just kill me."_

_I put my arms around her; she falls to the ground taking me with her. _

"_shhh……It's ok, I'm here, I'm right here. Shhh," I say holding her still. Wesley dropped the knife he was holding, and then the rain started._

* * *

She sobbed on my floor, I sat her up in my arms, whispering those same words of comfort. 

"shhh……It's ok, I'm here, I'm right here. Shhh."

She smiled slightly in recognition. "Now all we need is the rain, and Wes," She said wetly, laughing. I laughed to, and then became somber. Wes was gone, and so it was just us this time.

"This time, Wes isn't here, and I can't save you," I said softly, a tear slipping out of my eye to.

"Why?" She asked confusedly.

"You have to save yourself."

**So who was I to hurt you,  
To desert you,  
When you needed me there,  
So now that you've learned to hate me,  
You're finally set free,  
I fall to my knees,**

I left Angel's house slowly, thinking on what he had said. "How do you expect me to save myself?" I asked, crying again. "How?"

* * *

She left my house slowly; I knew she didn't want to leave. 

I'm sorry Faith, but you have to learn, I won't always be here for you, I won't always be a safe place. And I love you, but I'm pretty sure you hate me at this point.

I fall to my knees, crying as I curse the powers that be.

**And I'm breathing slowly,  
Like you said to do when you had lost control,  
My head spins from God's wind,  
That carries you away from me,  
Looks like you got away from me,  
This time,  
For good...**

I breathe slowly; my sobbing ebbs and I grab a stake.

The dark alleys are lit gently with a ethereal glow. I smile, and dust my first one tonight.

This is my life Angel, and you won't interfere again.

**And since those days have passed me by,  
I'm in and out of life,  
The way you used to be,  
You know I always was the strong one,  
But now I've come undone,  
Sweet Release...(come to me)**

It's been how many years now? I couldn't really say, maybe 12 or 13, I don't really know, all I know is that you still don't look a year over 21, and I don't look a year over 18. I always wondered why I didn't age, but I never really had an answer. I mean I wasn't a vampire like you, and the world certainly didn't need me with all the other slayers, so what is Angel? What did you do to me?

* * *

"How many years has it been, Faith? 12, 13, I don't know, I lost track a long time ago. It's really good seeing you again. You don't look a day over 18, and I wonder, why? 

**_Faith LeHane  
December 14th 1980 to January 9th 2015_**  
_**Hero  
Free  
RIP**_

"Is this what dreams are made of?" I asked, and then turned away, the wind ruffling my hair, and the rain coming down in torrents.


End file.
